Which Beautiful Woman Am I?

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ash wednesday

today is ash wednesday.and i have a lot to thank GOD for. i know i am so blessed, not just because of what He gives me but also for what He doesnt. sometimes i wonder why God loves me. it makes me feel awfully guilty yet thankful at the same time. while i unite myself with millions of catholics today, ash wednesday, w/c officially starts the lenten season, i pray that i can be the person God wants me to be and for once make HIm happy.

i spent the morning just hanging out at home- playing with RV and Migmig, watching some shows on tv. in the afternoon, ate aileen , grace and i went to the mall to finally catch the magic kitchen. and to my dismay, its not showin there anymore. disappointed w/ myself for always postponing my watchin it, i just couldnt believe that id let the whole movie, daos first ever, pass by just like that. ugh. the thought of not being able to support his movie, is such a disgrace to a self-proclaimed "certified-jerry yan-fan". Im not. hu hu hu... im sorry jerry. i am. i felt guilty watchin Milan as a substitute, though, i find the movie quite good. moreso, entertaining. im hoping to catch daos movie tom at Ever. im keeping my fingers crossed.

and if you think that all this watching is finished, well not yet. upon arriving home, i watched a movie again, starring denzel washngton. "John Cue" i think was the title. such a tearjerker. i cried a bucket the whole movie. its about fathers' unconditional love for his son who was about to die from a heart disease. he was willing to offer his heart and die. i swear it was so touching, i felt silly wiping my tears. i just couldnt help it. funny how some movie, those unknown to most people are really the good ones. those w/c will tear your heart and inspire you. "Simon Birch", "Lorenzos Oil", "Shawshank Redemption" and a lot more. not the usual moveis producers would wanna make. apparently they belong to my lists of favorite movies.

the day will come when DAO shall miss me

ha ha ha!! Dream on Angie! :p

ofcourse, its the other way around!

I MISS YOU DAO!!

confessions of jy junkies

In onlyjerry@yahoogroups.com, gaga-over-dao wrote:


"hi! wrote this way back and didn't have the courage to let anyone read it. now i feel more confident, stronger knowing that there are people out there like me, just plain gaga over dao :-) so here goes ...

I used to tease my sister who was so into MG and the F4 coz whenever she sees any one of them she screams and giggles and goes into euphoria (well, I’m exaggerating a little… just a little). I didn’t know who they were then and what the show was about, but still I teased her. She was so baduy and jologs, I thought.

Then I got to watch one episode on MG Rewind and I was hooked. Now, there’s collective screaming, giggling and sighing at 11.30 on weekends.

I saw JY and was hooked (pineapple hair and all). Oh, boy, was I hooked. I’ve always been drawn to the "maginoo pero medyo bastos" types and that was what DMS to me at first. I wasn’t content with MG Rewind and so I bought MG 1 and 2.

Who cares that our electric consumption jumped? Who cares that I sleep at 5am, wake up at 7 and go to work at 8? Just as long as I get to see JY/DMS. At this point, DMS and JY, for me, were interchangeable. My fascination hasn’t reach that point where I’d go surfing the net for him.

I didn’t go buy their posters nor plastic envelopes with their pictures on in. I didn’t go buy their playing cards nor their bath towels. But, I was slowly obsessing over JY. I was going over with a fine-toothed comb our newspapers at the office for even the minutest news on F4 esp. JY. I was doing those mini-movies in my mind where the highly improbable happens: I get to meet him in person and have a chance to talk to him and maybe a bouns kiss on the cheek :-)

Then I discovered that when I type "jerry yan" on my yahoo search bay. A plethora of sites open up. Portals all leading to JY are there. All I have to do is click and WHAM! All the details I want to know are there.

Now, I got to know who JY was. What he wants , what his ideals are, etc. I got a glimpse of JY the man. Someone who’s so much a departure from DMS. Now, I wasn’t only hooked. I was drugged.

I searched (still are) the internet for anything Jerry Yan. I enjoy talking about him to friends and family. I just can’t get enough of him. I have a Pepsi Poster, an MK poster and my phone home screen is Jerry Yan. I live and breath JY.

And now it has come full circle, my sister now teases me relentlessly about him. But, I don’t mind. I’m a fan. I’m entitled to be giggly, feel giddy and smile stupidly whenever I pass by his billboards along EDSA. I have the right to watch his debut film as many times as I want to... because i'm a fan.

Because, I'm a Jerry Yan fan and proud of it! :-)?"

what meteor catcher wrote in reaction to gaga- over-dao's confession:

"hi ms gaga-over-dao. : ) i know exactly how you feel. as in!!
I am into dao that i feel that he has become a part of my life.
I work in a call center so i arrive home from work at around 2 in the morning. Afterwhich, ill log into the computer, get the latest news, upload files, pix, videos even etc. I have actually completed downloaded evry song of the f4 into my fone. so when im bored i just lisen to it. Im so happy just passing by edsa knowing that ill be seeing there billboards. thank god for ben chan and pepsi and yamaha..and ofcourse abs cbn who has brought them into the philippines. I couldnt get enough of the f4, most esp dao, so i bought MG1 and MG2, Meteor Rain, went to their concerts almost dying of happiness, bought magazines and read them ofer and over again. ive grown to love his song- yao ding ni and all of their songs for that matter. the difference with me and you is that, I've grown to love dao, eversince they were first shown in the TV. I remember, rushing to get home just to watch it. And when the fone at home rang for me to answer, i wouldnt trade my watching of Meteor garden for anything. he he he. First thing that happened was I got addicted to MG and slowly, I developed a certain admiration for them all. on my part it has always been dao. I have been known as meteor garden fan at the office, i dont care what they think of me. Just like what you said, I'm a Jerry Yan fan and proud of it! :-). I love you dao!! I miss you!! Funny Im going crazy over him..and im even delighted that there are a lot of us who share the same feelings.

So cheers for you and me and the rest who the jerry yan fans!!
And ofcourse to you my beloved DAO, WO AI NI!!"

Gone Too Soon

There will always be tears in my eyes
when I remember everything about us.
Funny how often I used the word "us",
when it never even happened.
I ask myself why do you have to go away?
You left me holding on to a promised love
magical as the falling stars.
Did you not know that I've fallen in love with you too?
I was going to tell you that
but when I looked at you,
you were gone too soon...
I'd like to blame myself for this broken love
for I didnt let you know of my feelings right away.
Yet somehow, I know I did not let you go-
you let go of me.
Perhaps you did not see
how much I cared for you,
how I've dreamed about you,
how long I've waited for someone
like you to come into my life,
how happy I was when we talked over the phone
with just about anything-
the cottony clouds, the bluish mountains, those mushy love songs,
our loves, our mistakes,
our secret homes and dreams...

You let go of me, when you though Im never going to love you.
But I have loved you and kept it a secret.
I never did mean to fall for you
but I did.
And when I knew the moment has come,
you were gone to soon.
Gone to know of my feelings.
Gone to share it with me.
Gone like the swift falling stars
that has fallen to the earth
and left the sky crying a thousand lonely lights.
Suddenly gone.
You let go of me,
when you shouldn't have.

angie
may 2001

*****

1-2-3

I have totally lost it. Who am I kidding? Well, I have just, for the first time in my entire life, led a group of 3 friends, myself included, to walk out of a bar. Punchline, we did not pay the bill. AS IN WALKED OUT. I led them into it. I. Me. Myself. Angie. Whew! My heart pounding, hands perspiring, my feet dragging myself out of the bar. Or rather, my insanity dragged my always-sane-me to get out. Fast. Its not even about the money. Omigosh, I have totally lost my wits! My insanity got over the very logical me. That fast and easy. Ha ha ha! When we were quite far already, we didnt even bid goodbye to each other. We just picked a cab and went home. After awhile, when I was inside the taxi, Kathy texted me, "congratulations!" - yeah right, there goes my partner in crime. Well, honestly, she actually gave me the idea. Not that I'm blaming her, coz it was still me who stood up and really did it. 1-2-3 , her name for it. Now, that Im home, blogging this whole thing, theres nothing else i can think about but the word - KARMA! Yep, Ms. goody-two-shoes, B-E-W-A-R-E!!

im one person whos never been that excited over valentines day. when i say never, i mean never. A day in the year when people turn so mushy, sometimes i couldnt stand it.

******

here's another emode test i took "which Friend are you?"

Um, ok! You're, like Phoebe. Ok, so you may not have Phoebe's, well, special intuition or, um, musical talent. But, like everyone's favorite beautiful-blond-psychic-masseuse, you never lie and your friends are the most important thing in your life.

With an utterly free spirit like yours, some people see you as flaky. But creative, perceptive-as-heck, and eerily wise is more like it. You see the good in everyone, which could make your dating life a bit, well, uneven. But you always land on your feet with your humor, kindness, (and who-knows-what-from-beyond) as your guide.

Pink Chiffon

I'm getting hooked to the tickle tests by Emode. Look what my fave color says about me.

There's nothing saccharine about you — your sweetness is one hundred percent natural! A gentle, thoughtful romantic like you must be paired with a color that's soft and warm — but still has a subtle sophisticated sheen. That's why Pink Chiffon is the perfect color for you! You're probably known for making the most of every situation and trying to see the best in people. But while you may be cheerful and strong innocent at times, you're nobody's fool. You may see the world through rose-colored glasses, but you can still see, after all.

While you make wise insights time after time, it's probably your good nature and perpetual optimism that are what you're known for and what make you a joy to be around. Even those who sometimes make fun of your Pollyanna-like proclamations will turn to you when they need a friend and some cheering up. So keep pink, Chiffon. With you around, the world's a better place.

yeah, right im miss pink chiffon. so girly. but i like it though. like some sweety-softy-twinka-little-thing. which im not. or maybe i am.

Im punishing myself for using too much of my time infront of the computer. Imagine going home from work form 4 pm till 1 am, plus a grueling 2 hours of overtime. by then I reach home at 4 in the morning, and still the first thing that I do upon getting inside the house is to click the switch of the CPU and monitor. there. im crazy thinking i could relax my overly exhausted body by giving myself a 2 hr meet with my beloved computer. ugh. now, my eyes are sunk with black circles around it. i looked like a zombie walking around the mall early this afternoon.worst, i almost fainted in the church. nauseus, dizzy, the world infront of me was spinning very slowly. ugh. and still im here, blogging this whole thing instead of sleeping.

so the remedy-one good book. i miss reading. for me the glory of reading is enjoying some good adventure while putting myself to sleep without even trying to. a cure for both my insomnia and internet addiction.

and the punishment- no buying of internet cards, no reloading for my celfone.
which means, no googling over jerry yans pix, no reading of the latest gossips and news about the f4. thats the saddest part.

conclusion- better finish the book " The Color of Water". then go get the books i ordered from Booksale.com.

Heroes

There are people you meet that will change you forever. About how you view life. And friends. And God. Sometimes when I'm in my lowest moments, I breathe not to console my dreary spirit, but to wallow more into the pain. And just as you are to breathe again, to fall again, there are people who'll teach you to stand up and fight. The lesson they teach is to fight. And if you lose, you lose fighting. The dignity you'll gain and the blessing from GOd. My real friends turned personal heroes. And now more than ever, I miss them with all of my heart! :)