You are near

Yahweh, I know you are near,

standing always at my side.

You guard me from the foe,

and you lead me in ways everlasting.

Lord, you have searched my heart,

and you know when I sit and when I stand.

Your hand is upon me protecting me from death,

keeping me from harm.

Where can I run from Your love?

If I climb to the heavens You are there;

If I fly to the sunrise or sail beyond the sea,

still I'd find You there.

You know my heart and its ways,

you who formed me before I was born

in the secret of darkness

before I saw the sun

in my mother's womb.

Marvelous to me are Your works;

how profound are Your thoughts, my Lord!

Even if I could count them,

they number as the stars,

You would still be there.

sunset lane in moa

I had a quiet, blissful and happy saturday night. my family and i went to stroll and dine along mall of asia's row of restaurants facing the bay. hay, it was lovely! even before parking, we had the chance to view the colorful fireworks! and as we strolled, we noticed that the grounds were very clean and spacious. the walk was lined with lamp posts illuminating strollers with a kind of sepia glow. palm trees were sprawled near the fountain area where mostly kids look amazed at the artistic splash of water. the dancing waters of the fountain was spectacular, or maybe i was just surprised that it danced, with its different tricks to a groovy old frank sinatra song! kaaliw! the kulets were asking me with coins which they were planning to throw in the fountain. it then gave me the idea! i led them near the fountain, gave each of them a coin and asked to say they're wishes out loud! boy, were they excited!! nakakatuwa talaga ang mga bata! shempre, the aunt got to wish too ;) "1-2-3! say you're wish... kiss your coin.. and drop it in the fountain!" we saw our coins splashed below the fountains' shallow water. that, had them goofy and giddy!!! i, specially was in a play mode, running and tagging after my two pamangkins who were shrieking and laughing at the same time. then, my ate and i, had each of those two kulets, hunched on our backs while we race at the nearest palm tree! hehe! it was so, so much fun, i swear. i mean i should be doing this at least once a week to keep me sane ;)

anyway, along with these were restaurants and bars that offer great food, mostly seafood and filipino dish. bands also performed and made sure everyone was having a good time. every once in a while, a brave person would jam with them. we dined at trinity's, a seafood restaurant and preferred to stay outside. with the perfect view of the bay plus the great music playing, i know my mom was enjoying herself. and that alone, completed my night! hay.. ;) well, the food too was scrumptious especially the buttered, sweetened shrimps! ang sarap! again i was mentally jotting down that one of these days i'll conjure something like it ;) we passed some street artists. one had his face painted in ghostly white. he wore a black costume ala charlie chaplin. he stood in a tiny podium, staring at passersby, i guess to entertain. i was not entertained though, he looks damn scary!

after eating, we strolled back to the parking lot, passing all those funky sculptures of anchors and dolphins' tails. we found a spot and sat comfortably at the bays' walk. i stared at the black open sea infront of me while a small ferry passed with brightened little lights. and i was thinking of things. a slight breeze plus a dazzle of stars on black sky, always get me thinking of life, of love. yan, cheesy na. i can't help it, the place was downright romantic. tsk.

anyways, it was a happy night with my family. accompanied by soft breeze, feel-good music, delicious dinner and people i *smile* love, i reached home wishing for more of it this summer.

mabel and sis grace

miep, mumay and ate

ate. buchog and happy :)

pseudo-love

this day i went home feeling , oh so free!

and i finally saw it all- how my instincts have been perfectly right and how it was trying to save me all along. and so i've been right all along. sabi ko na nga ba!

and now i know that there is something about distancing that makes you see the world sharply defined. and i am amazed how it freed me!

because we mistake love with the need of companionship. because we give too much emotions to the wrong person. because we get too much amazed and emotionally-involved to have thought of it as something beautiful and magical. and we are wanting to be with that person only because there is potent and unrelenting nagging in us to find someone to love.

and then the distance.

sabi ko na nga ba.

i cannot possibly like him! not in a romantic type of way.

tsk. i cant always be sappy for things as complicated as this, diba ;)

closer to myself

by kendall payne

Digging deep, I feel my conscience burn
I need to know who and what I am
This hunger jolts me from complacency
Rocks me, makes me meet myself
Jacob walked a limp to remind him
Of the greater gift of the greater one
But when I fell, I fell to my own resources
How can I carry the truth, if I can't even crawl to you?

I wanna feel something sweeter than this sin
Cover me in leaves roll me over again
I've been everybody else now I wanna be
Something closer to myself

Paint me in a different light
Shed me yet another coat of skin
Mark me with ash until I'm clean again
Cause I'm so sick and tired
Of being sick and tired
I know I can love you, I know that I can

I wanna feel something sweeter than this sin
Cover me in leaves roll me over again
I've been everybody else now I wanna be
Something closer to myself